Justin Bieber is back at it again folks. No, not acting like a brat…wait, he did that too apparently, but we’re trying to focus on his new tattoo…wait, he acted like a big baby while getting one of his new tattoos? Okay, so we’re here today to talk about a few pieces of Justin Bieber tattoo news…none of them make us happy, as does nothing that the “Baby” singer does. The kid just isn’t good at being famous. Yes, he does a ton of charity stuff and that’s admirable, but so did Mother Teresa, and you don’t hear any stories about her peeing in mop buckets, or being crappy to service industry people, or trying to punch strangers in the face. Odds are pretty strong that he does most of his charity work because his public relations people and his agent (Scooter McBraun) tell him that it’s good for his image. Okay, let’s stop ranting for a moment and talk about the “news”…
So we’ll start with the part where Bieber acted like a tool; it was after getting a tattoo, so it’s within our scope. Aparently, there’s tattoo artists (at least one that we know of) who won’t work with the Biebs anymore because he haggles over price after the artist is done. Yes folks, that’s right; he gets ink and then after it’s on him and the artist has already done work that can’t be taken back, he tries to get his work done cheaper. Thar’s scummy on so many levels that you could build an apartment building dedicated to it. He’s worse than the people who ask for refunds on bad food after they’ve eaten it! Our office was in an uproar when we heard this news, but we were completely underwhelmed when we saw his new tattoo. It’s of an eagle, and it’s well done, but it doesn’t really knock our socks off. We’re more interested in why he was wearing jeans in a bathtub while “recovering” from his ink. Maybe he wanted to get clean pants and wash his upper body at the same time, but he was probably just really into linoleum that day.
Ugh, here we go again. We’ve talked before about how upset we are that “Boyfriend” singer Justin Bieber keeps getting tattoos. Well, he must’ve heard us, because as if only to spite us, he’s gotten more, and the newest one is absolutely infuriating. As if to declare himself the new King of Pop, Bieber has gotten a crown inked on his chest. We know about said tattoo because he insisted on posting shirtless pictures of himself to show it off. So here’s the issue: he isn’t the king of anything yet, he’s never even won a Grammy! Weird Al has Grammys! Okay, bad example; Weird Al is awesome and deserves all the Grammys, but the point remains: the kid hasn’t earned that ink yet.
He also really needs to stop posting pictures of himself shirtless; the kid doesn’t appear to know what the word “push-up” means, so he shouldn’t be showing the world his underdeveloped psysique like it’s his job. He’s built like Shaggy from Scooby Doo and an Ostriche had a baby, so he needs to keep a shirt on. We also can’t help but think that he thinks that tattoos make him a “Bad Boy”, well they don’t Justin, we all know you’re a wimpy little kid. Tattoos are meant to represent who you are, not who you’re pretending to be. We really can’t think of a nice thing to say about his new ink except for “Yeah, that’s a crown alright”, so we’re going to stop talking now. You’ve ruined our day again Bieber, and we’re sure this won’t be the last time.
We need to stop this kid from getting any more tattoos, because if we have to write one more article about Justin Bieber getting ink, we’re going to burn the whole office down with us in it. The “Boyfriend” and “Baby” singer has a few tattoos already and recently teased that he’d be getting matching ink with his girlfriend Selena Gomez. Now come word that he’s gotten a new tattoo that has nothing to do with his Disney love-affair. On a recent appearance on The Late Show, ole’ Justin Beaver showed off the “Believe” tattoo on his forearm, which he got in honor of the title of his newest album. This logic really makes us wish that he named his new album “Your Mom Says Hi” or “Baby Puncher”, because either one would be way more fun to see on the arm of a teen-pop idol. The current piece looks more like something a drunk baseball fan gets after his team wins a playoff game. Look, we don’t like Justin Bieber, but we also really don’t care that much, so it would just be easier on us all if her stopped getting stupid looking tattoos.