Celebrities love to stick out, it’s why they go out and get famous in the first place: they have a desire to stand out in the crowd. However, for some celebrities it’s not enough to just be famous, they have to be famous and weird at the same time. That’s like trying to be the biggest elephant; you’re already bigger than the other animals, now you want to be the biggest of the big! Elephant talk aside, some celebrities like to get tattooed with some weird stuff; whether it’s because they want to be even more notable, or because they just feel like being strange. Take “Jackass” star and legendary stuntman Steve-O, who got his own autographed photo inked on his back as a stunt for one of his movies. The tattoo is actually really well done, but it’s still extremely weird and completely crazy. Tattooing a face on yourself might not be as weird as getting yourself a face tattoo though…Yup, Gucci Mane has an ice cream cone tattooed on his face in honor of his song “Icy”…that’s pretty much an act of insanity. He’s known for being a bit of a loose cannon, he’s been to jail multiple times, and a face tattoo is a classic sign of an impulsive person. He doesn’t seem to regret his facial ink though, and that’s awesome for him, because tattoos are forever, so are childhood loves of literature…Ryan Gosling (“Drive”) has the cover of the book “The Giving Tree” on his left shoulder and it’s a pretty strange tattoo with an explanation that’s…uhhhh…off. He says that he got the tattoo because his mom used to read the Shel Silverstein classic to him when he was a child, but that he thinks the book is messed up and he would never want to be the Giving Tree because the boy uses him up until he’s a stump. Speaking of “stump”, we’re stumped in regards to the reasoning behind this tattoo…Yup, that’s a really bad tattoo of Ryan Gosling’s face, and it’s on “On The Way Down” singer Ryan Cabrera’s leg. It was allegedly chosen by his friends after losing a bet, and it’s pretty terrible, and actually looks a lot more like Ryan Reynolds. Speaking of Ryan Reynolds…just kidding, he wouldn’t get a weird tattoo, but we all know that Miley Cyrus would…Okay, the tattoo is of her dog, who passed a way a while back, so we can’t argue with the sentiment, but the tattoo itself is a bit whacky looking. Maybe she could’ve just gotten a normal picture of the ole’ boy. Weird or not, we will never not like a dog-lover’s dog tribute. We don’t like ice cream lovers’ tributes though…“Stay With Me” singer Sam Smith has this ice cream cone inked on his leg, and we don’t like it…that’s really all that we have to say about that. Let’s do one more picture for a pallet cleanser…Celebrities even like to stick out when they already stick out, Lady Gaga’s showing off her unicorn tattoo in the above picture to prove it. At the end of the day we’re just having fun folks, and anything that someone, famous or not, wants to ink on their body is their business. It’s just our business to give them crap about it…especially that ice cream cone on Sam Smith, that thing really bothers us for some reason.
Lady Gaga is really good at sticking out. Whether it’s her classic meat-suit or the sorcerer’s gauntlet thingy that she’s wearing on her hand in the above photo, she’s always doing something to separate herself from the rest of the pack. With that said, it should come as no surprise that her recent tattoo (one of many) wasn’t the standard run-of-the-mill ink that most other pop starlets get. No, it wasn’t your classic Miley Cyrus “Look how rebellious I am” poem, or you Selena Gomez-esque “It’s a bird because I want to spend my whole life flying free, aren’t I interesting” piece; instead it’s a prison tattoo. No, not a picture of Folsum or Alcatraz (although now that we think about it, it’d be a great idea to get a picture like that inked on one of our arms and than when people ask about it respond “that’s my prison tat”), but instead a tattoo done in the classic style of prison inking. Well that’s a lie, we don’t think that it was done with a broken pen and a heroine needle, but it was instead done to resemble the kind of work that one would get during a stay at the never-leave hotel. Done while on a trip to Brazil, the piece says “RIO”, but the “I” is replaced with a crucifix; it’s based on a design that a fan made for her. It’s not terrible looking, and in fact it gets the point across about the whole prison thing, but we can’t help but not like it that much. We dig the idea of getting something that a fan made for her inked on her neck permanently (did we leave the neck part out before? It makes the whole thing a lot more “prisony”), but we can’t help but point out that LADY GAGA HAS NEVER BEEN TO PRISON! It’s not something you can really fake the funk on, and not something that people of high moral fiber are usually proud of. It’s different, we’ll give her that, but she’s kind of crossing a poser line with this one, and we don’t like it. Now if she got it done in a back alley by a guy named “Roach” with a broken printer cartridge and a safety pin, maybe we’d be impressed, but for now, we’re not fans of Gaga’s new Poker Face…neck…we tried to get that song in there, sorry.
Is it weird that after all the meat-dresses, headdresses, wigs, and space alien/muppet hybrid-ish outfits that Lady Gaga has worn, we were actually kind of surprised that she has tattoos? Well she does; Lady Gaga’s tattoos are: a peace sign on the inside of her left wrist, “Little Monsters” on her left arm (a tribute to her fans), “Tokyo Love” on her left shoulder, flowers on her left shoulder, and some more flowers on her left hip/ left buttox area, but her most talked about ink is on the inside of her left bicep. Done during a late-night run to a tattoo parlor in Japan, it’s a quote from her favorite philosopher Rainer Maria Rilke. Translated from the German it’s written in, it says: “Confess to yourself in the deepest hour of the night whether you would have to die if you were forbidden to write. Dig deep into your heart, where the answer spreads its roots in your being, and ask yourself solemnly, Must I write?”. We can relate, we often ask ourselves why we write about Lady Gaga…zing! Wait, it’s because she’s more interesting than us (*sigh*).